Melanie Bender built her fragrance house LORE on a philosophy she calls "grounded ambition" — chasing big things in a way that builds you up instead of swallowing you whole, treating scent as joyful creation rather than something to prove. LORE's next release, Lil Softie, is a cocooning cashmeric musk — pink pepper, cereal milk, ambroxan — warm and addictive and soft in all the right places, launching today. Here she talks creative blocks, Dennis Rodman, and the print newspaper that changed her mornings.

What's the last film you watched that moved you deeply?

Val, the biopic by and about Val Kilmer. Its rawness, humor and beauty rocked me. First, because the ‘90s identity I had accepted about him was so wrong, or at least so incomplete. Second, because this incredible piece came out of him at a time that the universe was trying to break him. To be staring down the end of his life and yet never more comfortably himself — I found that deeply surprising, deeply moving and deeply beautiful.

What do you do when you hit a creative block?

Usually I do something else! The mind and its creativity remain a great mystery to me. Also a great joy. Being in a creative flow state and feeling something unexpected and beautiful taking shape — it’s a wondrous thing. But I don’t feel I control how it works. Some days it flows easily; others it’s tortured. Rather than fight that, I lean in when I find it flowing, and maybe try to see some wit in the world when it’s not. Dark chocolate also helps.

What book have you gifted most?

The Practice of Groundedness by Brad Stulberg. It teases out the difference between pursuing passions in a way that tears you down, and going after the same things in a way that builds you up. The difference between playing to win and playing not to lose (mostly it’s fear). For a lot of my career, my goals and passions felt so big that they swallowed me whole. That created distance from the joys in life (there are so very many), caused me to lose sight of myself and my values, and also made me less capable of achieving my goals. This book completely changed my relationship with ambition, centering it around joyful and fearless creation… so I gift Groundedness to each new LORE team member, and have them spend their first day completely offline and out of meetings, reading the book and building their own practices around it.

Where do you go to find peace?

Anywhere outdoors in the sun. It could be the beach in Hawai’i where I grew up, or the grass in my backyard. They both do the same.

Who is your forever inspo?

Dennis Rodman. He was daringly expressive, vibey and fluid at a time when athletes weren’t allowed to be. He was also deeply flawed.

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